Darren, Male, 53-54

	- Narrator, retired, father of Gwen and Victoria (Vic)

	- 5'11, beige skin, 195lbs, cropped greying brown hair

Audrey, Female, 16

	- High school senior, daughter of Duncan and Theresa

	- 5'9, pale skin, 140lbs, light-green eyes, straight auburn hair over her shoulders

Gwen, Female, 16

	- High school sophomore, daughter of Darren, sister of Victoria

	- 5'6, beige skin, 135lbs, shoulder-length wavy black hair

Victoria (Vic), Female, 14

	- High school freshman, daughter of Darren, sister of Gwen

	- 5'4, beige skin, 120lbs, wavy neck-length light-brown hair

Rainey, Female, 47

	- Night nurse

	- 5'8, 155lbs, beige skin, blue eyes, shoulder-length auburn hair

Joyce, Female, early-80s

	- Wife of Herman, grandmother of Audrey, mother of Theresa

	- 5'6, beige skin, 115lbs, bobbed salt-and-pepper hair

Herman, Male, early-80s

	- Husband of Joyce, grandfather of Audrey, father of Theresa

	- 6'0, beige-olive skin, 180lbs, thin short gray hair

Theresa, Female, mid-50s

	- Mother of Audrey, widow of Duncan

	- 5'7, pale skin, 150lbs, shoulder-length auburn hair

The next few days went by quickly. We went with Audrey, Joyce, and Herman to the Museum of Emerging Science and Innovation which turned out to be a really neat place. There were AI robots and cutting edge science machines and all sorts of advanced stuff that I knew Audrey was just eating up.

The day after, I took my daughters and Audrey to Disneyland Tokyo. Rainey wasn't feeling all that well, so she opted to stay at the hotel.

Mostly, the three girls stayed together while I waited for them to finish rides. I never was much of a roller coaster or thrill ride enthusiast, so I did a lot of sitting and taking pictures while the girls enjoyed the drops and turns and high-speed excitement. After the long day at the park, I took us back to the hotel and checked on Rainey.

Her stomach was a bit upset, not all that uncommon after eating a lot of unfamiliar foods, but she also said her period was due and it was normal to get cramps and unease just before. I ordered some miso soup for us and she sipped it slowly before telling me she wanted to get some sleep.

I decided to turn in, as well. We had one more full day in Tokyo before heading home on December 30th.

- - -

The 29th, as it turned out, was my fifty-fourth birthday. What does it feel like to be fifty-four? I didn't exactly have an answer for that quesiton on the anniversery of my birth. My mind was full of doubts and concerns, Audrey still prominent on my mind. I hoped that once we left Tokyo and got back to Houston, my swirling emotions regarding my young ex would recede again, that only the nearness of her on the trip was confusing me. Maybe I'd be able to commit fully to Rainey. She deserved to hear me tell her I loved her. She had to wonder why I didn't say it. Maybe, once Audrey was just an occasional presence in my life again, I'd find that I did love Rainey in the way I thought was only reserved for Audrey. So I hoped, at least.

Theresa had that day off from work and wanted us all to come over for a party she was throwing to celebrate the holidays and the coming new year. She'd invited what neighbors were in the city, coworkers, and friends she'd made, and she wanted us to come over that evening to join everyone.

I hung out with my daughters during the day. Rainey came out for lunch but still wasn't feeling well, and she asked if it would be okay for her to miss the party that night. I assured her it was fine, that I just wanted her to feel better, and that Theresa would, of course, understand. She went back to the hotel after lunch and my girls and I strolled around, popping into shops until we were ready to catch a cab to Theresa's townhouse.

The day had been rather warm given the late date in Tokyo, the sun shining bright up until it disappeared over the western horizon. Even with the onset of evening, the warm breeze was light and wonderful. I wore a thin jacket but probably didn't need it. Theresa welcomed us inside and there were already a couple of dozen people there. I saw Audrey, Joyce, and Herman talking with an elderly Japanese couple along one wall.

Audrey saw us come in and for a brief second, she offered a weary smile before her face straightened and she came over to greet Vic and Gwen. The three of them went off together and I joined Theresa in the kitchen to help with dinner.

“I wanted to apologize, again,” she whispered to me when no one else was around, “for what happened at Thanksgiving... I wasn't myself.”

“It's fine, really,” I assured her, “I was flattered and, if it wasn't for Audrey, I would have been interested...”

Theresa looked at me with sympathy, her voice low, “Is this still hard for you?”

I knew she meant being around her daughter. “Yes,” I answered honestly.

Theresa nodded. “She may not show it, but it's very hard for her, too...”

“I know.”

“Oh? Well, maybe she does show it, then...”

“I think we read each other better than you might expect.”

Theresa stacked seaweed wraps and freshly sliced raw tuna on a platter. “I know I probably shouldn't say this... but... she's still in love with you...”

I nodded but didn't reply.

“Even with another boyfriend in her life... she's not over you.”

I grew angry quickly. “Are you trying to make this worse, Theresa?”

“What? No,” she said a little too loudly, then calmed herself to add, “no, I... I'm sorry, Darren. I just... I like you. I... I know that... if this was a perfect world, you and Audrey would be together. And happily so.”

“But this isn't a perfect world,” I hissed, “and I have a girlfriend right now. And Audrey is with someone she loves. We aren't together anymore. We all need to let this go!”

I tried to calm down, breathing deeply. I saw a face or two turn towards the kitchen then look away. “Look,” I said as carefully as possible, “this is all still hard for me. For me and Audrey. But we aren't together. We can't be. No amount of what-ifs will change that. I'm still trying to accept that, and I know she is, too. Please... just... no more of this. It isn't helping.”

Theresa nodded slowly, then looked at the counter a moment. “I am sorry, Darren. I do not mean to hurt you or anyone. I won't bring it up again.”

“I appreciate that,” I said, finally calming, “and I'm sorry I got angry. I just... this week has been wonderful, but at times, it has been... challenging...”

- - -

I spent the next couple of hours trying to distract myself with conversation, meeting Theresa's guests and ignoring Audrey the few times I saw her. I called Rainey but got no answer. I hoped she was getting some rest.

I decided I needed some fresh air, so I left the townhouse through the back door and went to the nearby courtyard, the lush trees and bushes providing me a moderately cool, fresh zen aroma when I needed it most. I pulled a pack of Japanese cigarettes I'd bought the second day we were in Tokyo. It was unopened, so I pulled the plastic off, took one into my fingers, and lit it with a match. Inhaling, I let the old habit, one I'd given up months ago, provide a moment of calm.

Walking slowly along the paths, I made my way into the secret garden area. It was protected on all sides by high, dense bushes, with only small openings cut into the foliage in two places to allow the path and its occupants a way in and out. There were leaves all over, crunching loudly under my shoes, a pleasant sound in the otherwise-buffered space inside the garden.

There were two benches and a rectangle table with two built in stools on the back side. Bronze statues and smaller, sculptured bushes added character. Twin fountains sat in the back corners, tinkling lightly.

I sat heavily on one of the short sides of the table, my legs hanging off. I took a couple of long drags on the cigarette, trying to keep my thoughts healthy ones.

I heard someone approaching several seconds before Audrey appeared. “Oh...” she said when she saw me, stopping her movement, “sorry, didn't know anyone was back here.”

“Just needed some air.”

“Me too.” Audrey stood, looking anywhere but at me.

“Want to sit?”

She shrugged, then moved to the table and hopped up on the long front side.

I puffed a moment in silence.

Audrey said quietly, “Thought I'd heard you gave those up...”

“I did. Months ago, really. First I've had since. Just... just felt like one of those nights...”

“Yeah...”

More silence.

“Wish you were staying longer?” I asked.

Audrey paused then replied, “Yes.”

“Not wanting to leave your mom again?”

“That's part of it...”

She didn't explain further, and I hopped down from the table to grind my butt into the path before tossing it into the nearby trash bin. I turned back to Audrey, and her eyes were soft and watching mine.

There was no one thing that sent me into Audrey's arms in that moment.

No one thing.

Many things. Some not obvious, and they would only scare me later. Others, well, others were easy to see even then. I loved Audrey. And she loved me. What we did was only natural.

My arms wrapped around her and hers around me. Our lips met with ferocity. The desire, the need in Audrey's kiss soaked into my body and I pushed myself against her. I can't count the seconds we were joined. All I recall was that it was such a release to finally kiss Audrey again. To hold her. To show her how much I still cared for her. To tell her something I couldn't tell Rainey. “I love you, Audrey. I always love you.”

“I know,” she breathed, “I love you so much, Darren...”

Our bodies took over then. Audrey's legs spread, her dress was pushed up, her panties pulled down to hang off an ankle. We kissed while she fumbled with my zipper, my penis in her hand, desire on her lips. Audrey pulled me to her, her legs up and thighs pressed to my sides, the tip of my cock pushed through her labia, and then I sank into her as we moaned together.

The warmth of Audrey was relieving, blissful, urgent. We rutted quickly together, her hips rising to meet my thrusts, our kisses passionate and, in some ways, desperate. Our bodies moved together, wet and slick and too caught up in the moment to let our brains consider the consequences.

Audrey came, stifling her moans by kissing me, and seconds later, I filled her with my cum. Spurting, fiery, desperate ejaculations pulsed and splashed inside her. I let every drop tell Audrey how I felt. “I love you, Audrey. I love you...” I repeated over and over as we came together. Her whispers told me the same.

At some point, we came to our senses. Audrey pulled up her panties and fixed her skirt, my cum left to soak into her underwear. I put my penis away and took deep breaths.

Audrey stood, saying nothing, her eyes a mix of love and longing and, perhaps, regret. I think mine would have matched.

She walked off quickly and disappeared. I slumped down on the table, trying hard not to think about what had just happened.

- - -

Cheater.

That was me. That was us. I'd never cheated on anyone before. Not once. When I returned to the party a bit later, it was far too soon to understand the consequences, to know how things might change. How things must change. I made small talk with strangers, checked on my daughters, and pretended nothing so powerful and wonderful and troubling had just happened to me.

Audrey had disappeared. Even Gwen and Vic weren't sure, though they thought she might have gone to lie down. I felt a mixture of sadness and loss. For Audrey. For Rainey. How was I going to live with what had happened? Audrey and I shared a moment of weakness, of passion, a moment of love which I had never experienced with Rainey. How could I live with cheating on my girlfriend, a woman who trusted me enough to tell me she loved me?

I gathered my daughters and said that I was ready to turn in for the night. They were ready, so we said our goodbyes quickly and caught a cab back to the hotel. I let the girls know we'd be leaving early to catch our flight in the morning, then went into the room I shared with Rainey.

When I realized she was sleeping, I ducked into the shower and tried to cleanse Audrey's scent from my skin. It was a bittersweet thought. I loved smelling like Audrey's body, her essential aroma so wonderful and intoxicating. But I couldn't let Rainey notice that scent. It would destroy everything that night.

Instead, I showered and dried and found Rainey awake by the time I slid into bed beside her. "Hey," she said lightly, "just dozing..."

"Feeling any better?" I practically squeaked, a lump in my throat pushed higher by the knowledge of what I'd done with Audrey boiling my stomach.

"Yeah, much better. Started my period, so, the cramping is hopefully over."

"Good, good," I said, kissing her. I froze, remembering that I hadn't brushed my teeth. Could she taste Audrey on my tongue? Did she know that I had cheated on her just a couple of hours earlier?

She didn't seem to notice, and soon, she was moving against me in a way which suggested she wanted me to make love with her, despite her period.

It took me a lot of coaxing to grow hard. My mind was swimming with guilt. I felt dreadful. Rainey deserved better. I'd betrayed her. I'd betrayed her with my young ex-girlfriend, a girl of sixteen. If Rainey found out, if she ever discovered why I didn't tell her I loved her, she'd be crushed. My guilt tried to drown me.

Rainey sucked me for a long time before I was fully erect, but as soon as she let go, I started to grow flaccid. To hide my mental state, I flipped her onto her back and pulled down her panties. Her tampon string was obvious where it disappeared between her labia. I slowly drew it out and tossed it into the trash can, the light, metallic smell of menstruation in my nose.

I lapped Rainey's pussy slowly at first, then more urgently when she began to moan and tremble. The taste of her cunt was rich and meaty, more so than normal, the light metallic flavor of her blood soon dominating the flavors. I usually enjoyed such moments with my lovers. It was a way of telling them how much I loved being with them, the willingness to use my mouth and tongue when she was menstruating. In that moment, it was more the guilt which drove me on. I was trying, silently, to make up for my mistake that day. I brought Rainey to a quick orgasm, and then kept going until she had another.

It was just enough to make my cock grow half-hard, at least, so when Rainey's hands pulled me over her, I was able to penetrate her slippery vagina and thrust into her. I didn't look into her eyes, not even watching her face. I buried my nose against her neck, closed my eyes, slipped a hand between our bodies, and while thrusting in and out, used my fingers to bring Rainey to a third climax.

Her cunt became slick, a little sticky. Period sex always felt a little different. The blood had a thicker viscosity and dried more readily, it seemed. I could feel the discharge coating my shaft. Normally, I liked that sensation.

But it almost felt symbolic, that Rainey should be bloodied after I fucked Audrey. She'd been stabbed in the back. Betrayed. She didn't know it yet, but if I was a superstitious man, I might have believed the universe timed her period to coincided with me cheating on her. As wonderful as that sensation was under normal circumstances, Rainey's period blood only emphasized the guilty secret I now held inside. It made it difficult to stay hard, and I fought to keep my erection long enough to maintain appearances.

I gave up trying to cum. I didn't deserve to cum. I'd done that already with Audrey and no matter how I might wish it otherwise, Rainey was not Audrey. I didn't want her to know, of course. So, for the first time in my life, I faked an orgasm.

When I rolled off of Rainey, I immediately grabbed tissues and cleaned up the blood on her labia, enough cover, I hoped, for her to not notice the lack of semen trickling out of her pussy. She went to the bathroom after kissing me and whispering, "I love you, Darren," one more time. I wiped my cock with more tissues, then crawled under the blankets, trying not to drown in my guilt and fear.